A deep desire, built up and unpacked again from longing–
I started to nurture it, but instead fell,
down that rabbit hole
all darkness and earth like the black of shuttered eyes.
I want that void, absent of touch, where the murky bottom of the lake reaches hold
of my toes, and takes me to serene silence
where I can breathe. Alone.
Alone just means that you can play in your head.
That’s what 6 year old me would have said.
I want to stay in that dreamscape with the trees, creeks, cemeteries, and toads.
Because no one can leave you behind when you’re alone.